“You’ll have to bury this with me.” This is what my superstitious grandmother told the family when we gifted her an opal pendant necklace. Opals, she counseled, are bad luck for anyone not born in October. As she was the only October birthday in the family, none of us could take possession of the necklace…

Betrayal. It is a deep pain when it comes from something beloved. And believe me — that wallpaper was beloved. It’s a red, blue, and beige floral print perfectly mimicking the wallpaper of a 1980s country kitchen. It lines my powder room, an adorable little nook with a tiled counter and gleaming white chair rail.…

You may recall my absurd attempt at camping last summer. Our campground neighbor drove a pickup truck, the kind with a cover that lowers over the truck’s bed. A Google search tells me this is called a “tonneau cover,” and Google Translate tells me “tonneau” is French for “barrel.” I learn a lot of useless…

So I’m telling you that marrying an outdoorsman leads to all kinds of alone time. My husband and I have a bizarre dynamic — we were married before my husband’s love for the outdoors was fully, well, fleshed. It’s like I married a bald Chia Pet I intended to just sit there, but someone put…

The social media post was harsh. It read something like, “Why do parents think changing the spelling of a child’s name makes the child special? Raising a child to be special makes them special!” Well, my dad gave me a special name and raised me to be special, I inwardly huffed. I’m Wendi with an…

I had an epiphany this week. It came, as I think most epiphanies do, while I was watching Fast & Furious Presents Hobbs & Shaw. I’m kind of in love with the double ampersand there. I saw this movie in the theater when it was released in 2019. I had never seen a Fast &…

So I never got to my butchered Christmas tree last week. I have a word limit. Not a self-imposed word limit — my husband’s grandfather once told me I talk too much. His other grandfather also told me I talk too much. My word limit is editor-imposed. I’m pretty sure no matter how awesome I…

My holidays were marked by a sofa I couldn’t get rid of and a Christmas tree I accidentally murdered. How were yours? Let’s start with the sofa. I bought a new sofa. The old sofa had to go. There was just one problem. The new sofa was set to arrive on a Saturday. Trash day…

So I was reading this article about holiday stress and thinking I’d like to have some normal holiday stress instead of this berserker holiday stress that is solely responsible for the 15.5 Hershey’s Kisses I ate last Saturday. It was only 15.5 because, well, because I like to eat four at a time.,but when you’re…

Holiday traditions can be comforting, something to cherish and anticipate. Or they can be dreadful. Take Martha Stewart. She, like most of us, bakes Christmas cookies every year. Cookies bring such joy. And playing salmonella roulette with stolen bites of raw cookie dough? Is there anything more Christmas-y than that? But Martha also goes caroling.…

Under normal circumstances, I need very little prep to go to our cabin. Long ago, I stocked the cabin with necessities, to minimize how much I need to pack. A tour through the cabin will find the kitchen stocked with cookies, the bedroom hosting a romance novel, the bathroom supplied with concealer. Yes. I wear…

I took to heart those news articles about global supply chain issues affecting Christmas after I was lectured about the tilapia. My parents eat tilapia all the time, so they purchase it by the bag. I mean, by the bag. These are large bags, crammed with four or five tilapia filets. These bags are ten…

Last year, I gave you a list of Thanksgiving activities. That list was heavy on turkeys, light on Pilgrims. That’s because I was rejected by the Pilgrims. Sort of. I’ll tell you the story of my rejection. But first, I’m going to tell you about Harry Truman. Wait! Don’t go! I promise this isn’t a…

It’s Halloween weekend. So the holiday season begins on Monday, right? Let’s pull out our festive throw pillows. Bake cookies. Start shopping. Tell Burl Ives if he’s pouring a cup of cheer, we’re drinking. Ooh! And Rudolph! Yes. Put on one of the old Rudolph movies! Embrace it, because you know when you make your…

My husband looked over my shoulder at exactly the wrong moment. When pandemic lockdowns began, I wanted to connect with my kids. So I did what any pop culture-loving parent would do. I introduced my youngest child to Pee-Wee Herman and my oldest to horror movies. It was while we were watching Friday the 13th…

I bought the pumpkin. Its official name is “Medium Dark Woven Pumpkin by Threshold.” I bought it at Target because Target is a Siren, singing you a song about coming in for eyeliner but banging your ship against the rocks of $20 throw pillows you just can’t leave behind. I pictured that pumpkin in my…